Un-numbered List of things People Say on Upon Birthdays

"Happy Birthday...How old Are you?"
"I'm fwee."
"Ooooh, you're a big girl now."

"Happy Birthday. How old are you?"
"10."
"Double digits!"
(Birthday boy/girl pretends this is not a big deal.)*

13="Teenager!"
16="Driver!"

"Happy Birthday! How old are you?"
"Eighteen."
"Finally old enough to vote!"
"Yep...pretty exciting!"**

"Happy Birthday! How old are you?"
"I'm (22, 23, 24, 25 or 26). I know...I'm sooooo old."***

"Happy Birthday! How old are you?"
"I'm (27, 28, or 29)."
"Almost the big 3-0!"****

*But on the inside smiles, because it's actually a HUGE deal.
**Actually does not care at all about voting, just excited to buy cigarettes.
***Anyone who is older will find this response annoying, anyone who is younger will believe it.
****This has happened to me two years in a row. I figure it'll happen one more year and then people will say, "The big 3-0." And then I can just move on with it.

NOTE: The most interesting thing about being 28 is the fact that I do not get carded anymore. At all. Ever. I never saw this day coming and feel sad about it. When I was 25, I used to get super mad about this, Can't that guy tell I'm way older than 21 (because I'm soooo old)?? This feels like the youth cut-off line. I feel young. (I know that I AM young in a lot of ways.) But I don't look young. There are lines on my face from smiling too much, and people can tell. It's just sort of sad.